The Sudden Goodbye
by SabineAmnell
Summary: Set after the series. C.J. and Danny are just settling into their apartment in California when C.J. gets a call that sends her back home to Dayton.
1. Homecoming

It had been a long flight. But at the end of it, like she had told Josh, was Danny. C.J. saw him first as he stood by the gate scanning the crowd. He gave her a big smile when their eyes met and she returned it.

Once she was out of the gate, Danny approached and took the bag that was slung over her shoulder, "Hi." He cupped her cheek in his hand and they kissed.

It all seemed so surreal. It was difficult to take in, but her life had already changed completely. She could barely believe that she would not be going to the White House in the morning, that she was almost three thousand miles from the White House.

"How was the flight?" Danny asked, interrupting her thoughts.

"I haven't been on a commercial flight for years. Compared to Air Force One, it's a Nazi regime of sitting down and buckling your safety belt. A bad merlot and some peanuts made it bearable though." She gave him a sideways smile.

"Wait'll you see the apartment." Danny said as they walked outside.

C.J. noted how much warmer it was and realized the scarf she had on would be useless now, as would her winter coat. They hitched a cab and were at their new doorstep in a half hour. Boxed lines much of the walls, but Danny had clearly worked hard to make it livable. A glass fish bowl sat on the kitchen counter, C.J. smiled, looking at the white pebbles and palm tree inside.

Danny grinned, seeing that she had found the bowl, "For Gail when Josh ships her to us."

"She should be here tomorrow." C.J. told him.

"I thought I'd get us some take-out and I bought a bottle of champagne to celebrate." Danny began, "But first, let me give you the tour." He took her hand and showed her around, leaving the bedroom for last as the only furnished room in the place so far.

A beautiful queen sized bed was placed by a window with blue curtains. Two dressers were already placed as wells as an area rug. C.J. gave him a fond look, "Danny, you've been here for two days, how did you manage-"

"I wanted you one thing to be right when you got here. We've got three days before you meet up with Hollis again and since I think we'll be spending a lot of that in this room…" he let his suggestion trail off.

She gave him a look of feigned irritation and led the way into the bedroom, admiring. Turning back to him, she said, "Thank you for taking care of this." It was odd for her not to do everything herself.

He almost said something to the effect of 'that's what partners do', but she had been squeamish enough of that phrase that he kept silent, "Are you hungry?"

"Mostly tired." She said, apologetically, "Would you be vengfully angry if I fell asleep two bites into dinner?"

Danny smiled, "Of course not."

He left the room, leaving C.J. to start unpacking. Smiling down at the empty drawers, she filled them with the contents of her bag. She sat on the bed, slipping off her heels and lying back. Danny was back by then with two Chinese take-out containers. He handed her one with chopsticks sticking out as she sat up, "Thanks."

A couple bites in, Danny offered, "We could crack the champagne."

"Sure." She said with a smile. Her phone began to ding and she groaned as Danny left the room again to get champagne. Putting the food container on the night stand, she plucked the phone out of her purse and her breath caught in her throat when she saw Molly's name on the display, "Hello?"

Danny had a little pep in his step as he prepared two glasses with sparkling champagne. Seven years was a long time to wait and now things had changed so quickly that he could barely take it in. With a little smile on his face, he took the two glasses into the bedroom, only to see C.J. filling up her bag again.

"What's going on?"

C.J. turned to him with a stricken face, "I have to go." She was dialing on her phone, clearly fighting off tears.

"C.J.…"

"I have to go home." She said, her voice small and wounded, "Yes, I need the next flight to Dayton, Ohio." She said into her phone. Glancing at her watch, Danny saw her panic rise, "Alright." As she rattled off her information on the phone, she continue to try and pack. Danny set the glasses down and stepped in, looking for a way to help.

She hung up, "I have to go."

"I know." He said.

"The flight's in an hour. I'll never make it."

"Let me pack some things and follow later on, you go now." Danny offered.

Once again, she was a bit taken aback by the fact that she didn't have to take care of everything herself. It was a pleasant feeling.

"Is your dad…?" Danny began, afraid to know the answer.

"He had a stroke," She managed, grabbing her purse, stuffing her phone back inside and rushing toward the door.

Danny followed with her coat, "You'll need this." He said, handing it to her.

"Thank you." With that she was gone as quickly as she had arrived.


	2. Tears and Ice Cream

The second flight in less than twelve hours had rendered C.J. in a dazed state of exhaustion. Maggie was at the airport to pick her up. They did not embrace or exchange pleasantries.

"How is he?" C.J. asked as she got into the car.

"He's awake, not making much sense. He's weak." They rode in silence the rest of the way to the hospital.

C.J. allowed Maggie to lead the way through the main doors, into an elevator, and finally, a private room. Her heart sank when she saw her father's sunken face, his eyes closed, and his breath shallow. Standing in the doorway, she couldn't bring herself to go over the threshold. When Maggie looked back at her, C.J. took a deep breath and followed her inside.

Sitting in a chair by his bedside, she took his hand. His blue eyes opened slowly at her touch. She mustered the best smile she could manage under the circumstances, "Hi." She was careful not to remind him who he was to her as that only confused and frustrated him.

"Hello, young lady." His voice was barely above a whisper.

She could see it clearly that he didn't know her and, as used to that as she was by now, it never failed to be heartbreaking.

"You know what I miss?"

"What's that?" She asked, as if she wasn't crushed by his lack of recognition.

"I miss my wife."

"I'm right here." Molly said, her voice anything but loving.

"No, my wife, Sandra Jean." He said, ignoring Molly's bitter tone.

C.J. snapped to attention at her mother's name. She swallowed the flood of emotions that made her eyes tear up and her heart catch in her throat. She heard Molly walk away, "I know, I miss her too." C.J. whispered.

"You look something like her, you know that?" He gave her a curious look.

Trying to blink the tears away was doing no good. Her father looked so weak and seemed to be fading right before her eyes. What tipped the sorrow to the point of overflow was her father remember his wife, her mother, at this moment. One only had to look at him and know he was dying, however, and so much regret and sorrow mixed with the joy, "You know who I am?" She asked, not daring to hope.

"Claudia Jean."

C.J. smiled and sobbed at the same time, "Yes."

"I named you Claudia, didn't I?"

"Yes." She put his hands against her face and kissed it, "You usually don't know me."

"I know, I don't know why." He became distressed, "I wish I knew why."

"It's alright, Dad." She took his hand in both of hers.

"We should go get some ice cream. I have a sore throat and it helps."

"I'll get you some." C.J. offered immediately, letting his hand go and leaving the room quickly. Wiping tears from her face, she tried to gain her composure as she went to the nurse's station, "Hi." She greeted the nurse.

The nurse clearly recognized her, but was too polite to say so. Even so, she stumbled over her first words, "Good morn-evening. Can I help?"

"Talmidge Cregg, can you give me any information on him?"

The nurse pulled open a drawer and retrieved a file, "Well, this is his second stroke in as many weeks. He's stable right now but we also discovered that he may have been suffering silent strokes for a while now. A recent MRI revealed some lesions on the brain conducive to such attacks. His kidneys are also in decline." The nurse stopped, looking at the fact sheet she had pulled, and then back up at C.J., "I'm sorry, but he has multiple organ issues. We already spoke with his wife."

"Well, I'm his daughter."

"Yes, Mrs. Cregg assured us that she would inform you." The nurse looked red in the face and embarrassed, "I apologize, we should have called, but-"

C.J. shook her head, "It's not your fault." She told the young nurse, trying to push down her fury and looking around for Molly. Pulling out her phone, intending to call her father's current wife, she found a text message from Danny.

Next flight 3am. Arrival 9:32am.

She turned back to the nurse, "Is the cafeteria open? Do you have any ice cream?"


	3. Memories

"It's likely he recognized you because it's been awhile since he's seen you." The same nurse was explaining to C.J. after she handed C.J. a small cup of vanilla ice cream, "Long term memory has a way of creeping up on Alzheimer's patients every now and then when it's been triggered."

C.J. had followed her down to the cafeteria asking questions all the way. The nurse seemed a little surprised when C.J. told her that her father remembered her for a moment. The explanation did nothing to calm C.J.'s sorrow or guilt and she thanked the nurse for the ice cream and walked hesitantly back into her father's room.  
>"It's too late for ice cream, isn't it?" He asked when she showed it to him. His voice was so small she had to lean in to hear him. It was clear that he had forgotten that he asked for it and she didn't have the heart to confirm that he had forgotten her again as well. Setting the ice cream down on a table, she sat beside him again.<p>

Hearing footsteps, she turned to see Molly in the doorway. Trying to hide her fury, she gave her father a smile, "I'll be right back." Passing Molly, she said in a low angry tone, "I need to talk to you."

Molly followed complacently and when they were far enough away, C.J. turned on her, "Why didn't you call me last week?" She demanded.

"The inauguration was coming up, your time at the White House was coming to an end." Molly said, her tone not confrontational.

"So you felt I would be too busy to hear the news that my father was dying?" C.J. demanded, trying to keep her voice low, but failing.

"He asked me not to tell you." Molly defended.

"What?" C.J. stopped her own attack at Molly's unexpected words.

"Before he was hospitalized, just a week or so after your reunion, he made me promise not to tell you if something happened to him if it would interfere with your job." Molly's voice now carried grief and defense.

C.J. gave a ragged sigh, her body language going from offensive to resigned as Molly continued passionately upset, "He said that the President was more important than he was and that no matter what I would wait if something important was going on. I told him it would make you hate me, but he made me promise anyway."

"Molly." C.J. said, trying to stop their conversation from spinning out of control, "I don't hate you, I just wish..." She let herself trail off, unsure of what Molly should have done instead. Had Molly and her father been right? Could she have really left the President in the very last week of his term? C.J. broke eye contact and turned away, "I'm sorry, Molly." Wrapping her arms around herself, she walked briskly back to her father's room. When she found him asleep, she sat in the chair next to his bed, pulled her coat around her and closed her eyes, drifting off to sleep.

* * *

><p>C.J. was awoken just a couple hours later when a nurse came in with a breakfast tray. Groggy and sleep deprived, she took a moment to realize that the nurse was asking her to leave.<p>

"He doesn't like it if people are around when he eats." She said, gently.

Her father's blue eyes were glaring at her suspiciously and she felt very much like a reprimanded child as she left the room. That particular look could be traced back many years of misbehaving and then being lectured. Pacing the hall, she looked at her watch and saw that it was just after seven in the morning. She felt so drained that she could barely think straight and the couple hours of sleep in the chair had done little to revive her. She wandered the halls, finding no sign of Molly and smiled at the few nurses she saw milling around doing their work. Finally, completely a full round of all the halls, she found the door to her father's room open again.

"Dad." She smiled at him. He did not smile back.

"You were here earlier."

She had to get close in order to hear him. "Yeah."

"You will be here later?" His voice was broken and soft and C.J. had to bite her lip to keep from thinking about it.

"Yes." She nodded.

As he closed his eyes, seemingly unable to stay awake any longer, C.J. sat back, watching him as silent tears fell down her cheeks.

_"__Tal, you're going to have to break it to her." Sandra Jean murmured to her husband, eyeing her youngest child, sitting by the tree in the middle of their yard._

_Tal sighed, looking at the same sight of the seven year old who refused to wear a shirt. He opened their screen door and stepped onto the stoop, "C.J." He summoned, his tone anything but stern, "Come here, darling." He sat on the stoop._

_A mutinous look and a shuffle brought C.J. to her father, knowing that refusing would lead to ultimate punishment; being grounded._

_"__You have to wear a shirt, C.J." He told her._

_"__It's hot out and you don't wear a shirt when it's hot. Max and Jake don't have to!" She objected._

_"__You're a girl, C.J., girls have to wear shirts."_

_"__That's not fair. Why do boys get special treatment?" C.J.'s blue eyes filled with indignation, "At Christmas and Easter, I have to wear tights. They don't have to wear tights. I hate being a girl."_

_Tal paused, having no idea what to tell his daughter and feeling that she was just a little bit right, "What would you rather wear at Christmas and Easter?"_

_"__Pants." She said instantly._

_"__It's a deal."_

_Her blue eyes got wide as she realized that she got her way, "But, won't mom-"_

_"__I'll talk to your mother, but you'll still have to wear nice dress pants at Christmas and Easter like the boys. But, you have to promise me something else."_

_She raised an eyebrow._

_"__Never hate what you are. I promise that we'll all treat you the same as the boys, but you need to embrace what you are. A lot of girls don't like wearing dresses, but not all of them think they can change it like you have today."_

_"__Why not?"_

_"__Because that's what they've been told and_ some_ people do what they're told_." _He gave her a playful poke to the ribs and she giggled, "Not everyone is the same. Some people aren't as brave as you, or as smart. Some people have parents who would never let them change and it's the girls like you that can make them see that they don't have to act like what people think a girl should act like."_

_"__I don't have to wear a shirt either?" She ventured, hopefully._

_"__C.J., your mother is right about tonight. We're going to dinner with your grandmother, we all have to wear a shirt." He said, patiently._

_"__What about when I'm outside playing?"_

_"__For now, when you're here, you don't have to."_

_Her smile was huge as he stood and held out his hand, "What if you want to wear dresses again when you get older?"_

_"__Then I'll wear them." She said as if it were obvious. She took his hand and they walked inside._

C.J. shook herself out of the dazed state she found herself in while reminiscing. Had she actually been asleep? Blinking, her attention was caught by the monitor, beeping rapidly. Alarms were going off and C.J. was on her feet in a moment, rushing toward the door. Three nurses were already rushing past her and she got out of the way. Finally, she brought herself to look at her father, pale and unmoving. An oxygen mask was applied and the monitors calmed.

A nurse finally ushered her out. C.J. knew she shouldn't be one of those family member who asked a million questions while the nurse needed to do her job, but she couldn't help but ask one thing, "Is he having a stroke?"

"It looks like it, we'll take him down for tests in a few minutes, once he's stabilized." The nurse disappeared inside, leaving C.J. in the hall, hugging herself.

A few minutes went by before Molly was rushing down the hallway, "C.J."

C.J. turned toward her stepmother, "They think it's another stroke."

"They called me, I was already on my way here." She seemed very calm which irritated C.J.

"I was going to suggest you come back to the house with me and get some sleep."

"I can't leave now." C.J. objected.

"I know." Molly said, sadly.

The door opened and they wheeled her father out. Moving out of the way, C.J. and Molly watched in horror.


	4. Vulnerable

A nurse hung back as Talmidge was taken around the corner, "It looks like another stroke, we're going to see the extent of any brain damage with an MRI." With that, she left them in confused silence.

Unable to bring herself to continue any conversation with Molly, C.J. went back into her father's room to wait. Sitting with a sigh and casting her eyes upwards, the world began to spin. She had barely slept in days, the last thing she'd eaten was a few bites of Chinese take-out more than twelve hours ago, and she had come just in time to watch her father waste away. The waiting was agony and C.J. paced. Pulling her phone out of her pocket, she read another text from Danny.

_On the ground. Be there soon._

For some reason, this frustrated her. She had no idea how to deal with this situation on her own, let alone with Danny around.

Molly interrupted her thoughts, "You should go to the house and gets some rest, I'll stay here and call you when I know anything."

C.J. couldn't bite back the sharp response, "You knew something a week ago and didn't call me."

"He-" Molly tried to interject defensively.

"Right, he told you not to, but you should have anyway, Molly."

Molly became silent and left the room after a moment. C.J. watched her go, unable to regret her harsh words. Dropping into the seat beside her father's bed with a heavy sigh, C.J. put her head in her hand and fell into a dazed state, staring at nothing.

She didn't know how long she was sitting there, but she slowly pulled herself back together. Standing, she began to tug stray hair back into place and adjust her clothing using the window as a mirror. She sat back down with a sigh, crossing her legs. She knew she was at the end of her rope and needed sleep and would soon have to take Molly's advice. The last thing she wanted to do was to go to her father's home where the memories still lingered however. Holding her hand over her eyes, she looked up at a noise and saw Danny standing in the doorway, wheeling a small suitcase behind him. He gave her a small sympathetic smile.

She stood to greet him, smoothing down her wrinkled skirt, "Hi."

"How ya doing?' He asked, softly, approaching. He looked at the empty bed and his face was suddenly masked with horror. He looked back at C.J., afraid to ask.

C.J. wrapped her arms around herself, "He had another stroke, they're doing some tests." In spite of herself, her eyes filled with tears. Danny reached out to her, his hand touching her arm and she instantly unraveled. Her arms fell to her sides, her facade of composure dropped, and she was completely vulnerable.

Danny pulled her in a hug just as she gasped out a sob wrapping her arms around him. He held her, saying nothing, as she cried. Finally, she pulled away. Even so, he took her hand, allowing the contact and support to continue.

"I'm sorry." C.J. said, barely audible as Danny handed her a tissue.

"There's nothing to be sorry about." He assured her.

"You didn't exactly sign up for this." She said sadly, as she wiped tears from her face.

Danny gave an amused scoff, "Yes, I did. I didn't just commit to be with you except when bad things happen."

Once again, C.J. was struck speechless by Danny's steadfast devotion. He was right, she had a lot to learn about sharing her life with him.

"When was the last time you slept?"

"A little last night."

"And, I imagine you haven't eaten anything since you left for the airport." He observed.

"No."

"I could go get you something. You gotta eat."

"Okay." She nodded, knowing that she needed to eat or sleep and could not go much further if she did neither.

Danny gently tugged on her hand and leaned in to kiss her cheek, "I'll be back." As he turned, however, he came face to face with a nurse and stopped short.

"Ms. Cregg?" The nurse ventured.

"Yes." C.J. stepped forward, tentatively.

The nurse looked at the ground, "We'll be sure to send you all personal effects. We can make arrangements with a local funeral home or one of your choice."

C.J. was frozen, "What?"

The nurse seemed to hesitate, "I can come back later and discuss…if you need a little more time."

A doctor walked through the room door then and looked at the C.J,'s stricken face, "Ramona?" He looked to the nurse.

"Oh Dr. Boylan, I thought you already-" The nurse stammered, her facing turning bright red.

"What happened?" C.J. demanded.

"I'm sorry, Ms. Cregg, I was just coming in to tell you. Your father passed away about fifteen minutes ago. I got pulled away before I could come up and tell you. I'm so sorry for your loss, we'll give you a few minutes." He ushered the nurse outside the door, leaving a stricken C.J.

C.J. took half a step back, stunned into silence. She felt Danny's warm hand on her arm and heard his soft voice but she felt so completely numb that she didn't react. The room began to spin and she felt unsteady on her feet.

Danny saw as the news hit C.J. like freezing cold water suddenly dumped on her from the sky. He stepped forward, trying to find the right words, his heart breaking, as he watched the news take its full effect. She stepped back and he could tell she was off balance.

"C.J., sit down." He said, softly, pulling out a chair. She complied and he knelt in front of her, taking her shaking hands. Finally, her features softened and her eyes filled with tears. The man who had inspired and loved her her whole life, taught her that knowledge was the most powerful thing anyone could possess, and encouraged her to be a great woman in a man's world, was gone. He had fought hard against his disease and ultimately lost and closure had been nearly impossible. How could you truly say goodbye to someone who didn't know you anymore?

She drew one of her hands away from Danny's gentle touch and put it over her face. The dam broke as the sorrow destroyed her defensive barriers and she wept in her hand. Danny stayed close, soothing her the best he could. Trying to compose herself, she sat up, wiping tears away, only to be pulled back into the overwhelming grief once again. She was finally pulled back to the surface by the sound of Danny's voice and his gentle touch. He was handing her another tissue and telling her that he was sorry.

She allowed herself to focus on him, "Thank you."

"Let me get you home." He said, softly.

For a moment, she didn't know what that meant. What felt most like home right now was Washington DC, but technically, it was Santa Monica. She knew he must mean her childhood home, however and shook her head, "I don't want to go there."

"I'll get us a hotel then." Danny offered instantly.

Before C.J. could answer, Molly entered the room. C.J. looked up but could tell that Molly had already gotten the news. She looked stunned, but also almost relieved.

For a moment, C.J. blazed as she regarded Molly. She turned back to Danny without a word to Molly, however, "Okay."

C.J. stood, feeling light headed. She was truly spent and was as tired as she had ever been working at the White House. Still, she walked steadily past Molly.

"I'll take care of everything here." Molly said, abashedly.

C.J. was silent as she passed her. Danny felt awkward about this woman who was C.J.'s stepmother but he had bigger things to worry about than being rude at the moment. He gave her a small nod, following C.J. out.


End file.
